Movies for a Rainy Day

The Good, the Bad, and the So-Bad-They're-Good.

Archive for the category “Kids Flicks”

Snow White and the Seven Pecks…er…I mean Dwarves.

“Why am I so much like Bavmorda!?”

Just in case some die hard fans of this movie get angry with what I’m about to say,  I’ll start with a big “I loved this movie”.

That being said, did anybody else notice that this movie was almost exactly like 1988’s “Willow”? I mean, there were a few less mystical animals and the “chosen girl” was a baby and not a woman in “Willow”, but I think Hemsworth studied Kilmer a bit to get ready for his role as the Huntsman. It makes me wonder if these two stories are based on the same Celtic myth. I’m down for that. I love Celtic, Viking, Greek…any mythology, really.

This movie is the newest in, what I hope to be, a long line of positive, strong female role models. Snow White and Alice (from the last Burton movie) are two strong-minded and adventurous girls that don’t rely on sexuality to get the job done (or have men do the job for them). Fantastic movie and I can’t wait to see what’s next. I hope “Mulan”.

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Yeah, but I was 7.

Think back to the time when you were just a little kid, sitting on the floor in front of the television set, waiting for that old tape of your current favorite movie to start. That inch of tracking static creeps up the screen and finally, “Masters of the Universe” starring Dolph Lundgren as He-Man comes on. Now your childhood flick might not have been “Masters”. Maybe it was “The Black Hole”, “Little Monsters”, or “Return of Swamp Thing” (yeah, the sequel. I don’t think any kid even knew there was a movie before this one). Are you smiling? No? Then you must have made the mistake of watching it again as an adult.

Whoops.

Unfortunately, those one or two flicks from our childhood just don’t stand the test of time. I made the mistake of buying “Masters” on DVD. I then spent the next 106 minutes wondering why the hell I did. All those happy memories of running around the house in nothing but my underwear, swinging a cardboard sword, screaming “I have the POWER!” melting away and being replaced with “Holy crap! Is that Courtney Cox?” and “Wow. What a Storm Trooper rip-off.”

Disappointing.

Don’t do this to yourself. If you have a favorite childhood movie that comes up in conversations from time to time and people start tearing it apart, that urge to stand up for it will come. But take some time to think about it before you do something drastic like buying it and watching it as an adult. Yeah, you have some great memories of all the times you watched it over and over as a kid, but there is a huge difference between a classic children’s movie and a movie that only a kid can love.

So, avoid damaging those memories. If you get that nostalgic feeling to the point of putting a DVD in your Amazon shopping cart, STOP! Take a deep breath and say to yourself, “Yeah, but I was 7.”

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